Musings
by D.Gray-Stuck
Summary: Jasdevi muses over the person in which he fell in love. But it was all too late to do anything, and your imagination is only in your head. It's not real no matter how much you hope for it. Jasdevi/Krory- One-Sided: Shounen-Ai


**Okay yes, I know I should be updating my other fanfic, and yes I know I've been super lazy with it. But I also still don't see much people doing anything for this pairing and I still feel like I need to do more for it. I also still have a GrimmUlqui fanfiction that I've been working on whenever I had time. Actually, that's the one I've been laziest on. I haven't gone over a thousand words in 5 months of writing it. And it's only one chapter long. God, everything is so complicated right now! **

**Warning: ?uh boy-love, I guess? I actually have no idea what the plot is even going to be; it's blind writing I guess. ONE SIDED LOVE**

**Also: I had someone who was a guest review my 'Beautiful Blonde' Jasdevi x Krory fanfic. I have a feeling they MIGHT read this one too xD So you know who you are; thank you for that lovely review *hearts hearts* :)**

**Settings: Jasdevi defeated Krory, but left him alive, and then left the Ark. He then starts musing over whether he should have stayed and helped him instead.**

**~~Start~~ :3 ~~ Jasdevi POV ~~**

We cant stop. We...just want our minds to think normally again. It's not fair. We shouldn't think this kind of stuff. We're _Noah_ for God's sake. So why? Why are we thinking these horrible thoughts? I mean, it's not like we _hate_ the thoughts exactly. Actually, we more or less love them, but we know we can't let our inner Noah know this; It would put our lives at risk!

It could _kill us_.

We couldn't live if one of our halves died. If one died, so would the other. But...it is bound to happen anyway. It's inevitable. Especially with the thoughts that are running through our minds.

I mean...

_He's an Exorcist_... Of every person in the world, we think of an _Exorcist_ in _that_ kind of way.

Not to mention that he was male; the same as us! Though we're often mistaken as not male.

But... how can we think the thoughts we think? About him? About the vampire-like Exorcist? We didn't even meet him for more than twenty minutes...

But...in that small amount of time that we fought, so many emotions went through our heads. And thoughts as well...

Thoughts such as 'He understands how humans called us monsters...'  
'He must have experienced the same pain as us'  
'He cares for his friends more than his own life'  
'He is actually kind of cool'  
'We might actually like this guy'

It was hard for us to put him in the Iron Maiden. We so badly wanted to pull him out of it and apologize to him for everything; even go as low as to beg him for forgiveness. It was worse when he reached out to us from inside the Iron Maiden; was he reaching for help or for an attack? We were never sure...

Tch, what have we become? Love-ridden fools, that's what.

But that's good.

Being in love is good. It brings happiness and sadness at the same time.

We already knew we were in love though.

We were in love with the vampire-like Exorcist; Arystar Krory 3rd.

But it was the sad kind of love; but a different kind of sadness to the humans. They go along the lines of 'sempai doesn't notice them', but we go along the lines of 'is he dead or alive? Does he hate me? Beacuse we fought that one time?'

Maybe we were 100% sure we were in love with him when we kissed him...

Does he know about the kiss, though? Is he even still alive? I don't know, but I hope he is so we can have the small chance of seeing him again. Maybe...get to know him some more.

But I can still feel him on me; from when he hugged us against his chest so his friends could get away. We really feel guilty about stabbing him with our hair; it was a reflex reaction!

Maybe if we ever meet again he might blush because he remembered the kiss. That would be cute.

Too bad we will never get to see him again. We're positive of it. We can dream of it, imagine it, think of it, beg for it; but nothing will work.

At least not while we are laying at the Earl's feet.

Covered in blood and struggling for breath.

We guess our inner Noah comunticated with him in some telepathical way; damn the Noah inside us. Damn him to hell.

But now everyone knows. All the other Noah's.

Wisely

Road

Tyki

All of them know; every single person. Even those whos names we cannot bother to remember.

Everyone knows of our love.

My love for the enemy. They're not going to let us go un-punished. They've already hurt us pretty bad.

Hey...everythings going black. My vision is fading. I guess this is the end for us. They've decided it's best to finish us off; to avoid corruption to the Earl's plans...

But hey Vampire, Hey Vampire Exorcist...

Hey Arystar,

I love you

Although you will never hear us say that for I'm afraid this is it for us. You'd be disgusted anyway.

Goodbye, vampire.

**~~End~~**

**Oh god. Whyyyyyyyy. How could I do this to my DGM OTP? I'm almost crying from writing this. **  
**Here- Have a little extra with some fluff:**  
**EXTRAS:**  
Stroking long blond locks, the vampire-like Exorcist threaded his fingers through the thin boys hair. "Hey, vampire?" The smaller boy whispered , leaning back further into Krory's chest.  
"Yes?" Krory replied in a low voice, nuzzling the side of Jasdevi's neck.  
"Do you love me?" He asks, blushing slightly.  
"What makes you say that? Of course I do." The exorcist says, trailing butter-fly kisses down Jasdevi's neck.  
Jasdevi smiled and shifted his position so he was sitting in Krory's lap. "Good." He says and kisses Krory softly, his lips moving ever so slightly against the others, who kisses back immediately.  
"Because I love you too." He smiles and hugs the taller man.  
Krory smiles and hugs back.  
Now they can only pray that they can stay like this forever.  
In each others arms.

**~~End for real!~~**  
**There you all go although almost none of you will probably read this. Well...almost none of you. **  
**Why am I listening to Gakupo- Nishiki no Mai (Vocaloid) while writing something this saddening? I don't maybe because that's sad too ;_; **  
**Now I'm rambling sorry. **  
**Peace Out!**


End file.
